


Lots of Ideas

by Dovey



Category: Naruto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-03-30 01:34:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13939710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dovey/pseuds/Dovey
Summary: a list of various au's I've come up with that I'm not sure have enough grounding to make into full fics. If there's enough interest in any of them I'd be more able to try and make it work.don't worry, my other fics will continue as scheduled! just wanted to put these ideas out there. If you'd want to write any of them, please let me know, because i'd love to read it them too lmao.





	1. Chapter 1

1\. Sasori/Sakura au, in which they're about the same age (Sasori is 15, sakura 13). Sasori was promoted to Suna jounin relatively recently and gets sent to Konoha to help supervise the chuunin exams. He's, you know, Sasori, so he's mostly bored by the whole thing and annoyed at getting assigned such a low-level mission, but while everyone else- including gaara- fixates on Sasuke Uchiha as Rival Material, he zeroes in on Sakura. It takes him a while to figure out he's experiencing a (intense) crush, but in the meantime he finishes up his newest, most powerful puppet yet! It's got pink hair and more than a passing resemblence to Sakura, which all the genin girls find _so romantic_ and everyone else finds creepy as hell.  

 There'd be at least one scene where he's interacting with the puppet and someone- probably Naruto- spots it and thinks it's actually Sakura. On the cuter side of things, there's also gotta be at least one scene where he has the puppet do something extremely Cool and Strong and Sakura gets pumped/inspired by the idea that someone could even pretend she could be so cool! 

 it probably ends with them being penpals or something else shockingly innocent considering the premise and, like, Sasori. 

 

2\. a gen fic (or casually sakura/sasuke) where with Sakura as a trans girl, because it honestly fits a lot of the weirder habits she has in canon that you can more likely attribute to kishimoto not getting girls. (Example- She has pink hair and is named Sakura? ALMOST LIKE A FIVE YEAR OLD BESTIE PICKED OUT THE NAME, HM. anime's general obsession with girls comparing cup sizes like, literally every time they see their friends?) Tsunade would also be a trans woman & they could bond over it! It feels like Sakura would overall have a really positive life, her parents would be supportive, Ino would be On Board... Sakura's issues in canon with wanting to be a shinobi but being very weak would fit well if you consider that she's trying very hard to present as feminine so she doesn't get misgendered, but so much of ninja stuff is masculine coded. 

 

3\. Sakura is recruited to Konoha's honeypot team and becomes super tight with her teammates there (an older woman and a boy about her age who acts like a big brother). It started off with a joke I made with a friend about how sakura's constantly referred to as undesirable, and is generally drawn cute-but-average, and yet somehow has like four boys chasing after her for years  _and_ a bunch of one-off characters hitting on her? Anyways, explanation for it could easily be that while a ninja would be suspicious if a gorgeous model asked them out, if a cute-average girl who's endearing but not Messiah Complex Charasmatic (Naruto) they'd probably fall for it a lot easier. Every member of the team would have a speciality, since it feels dumb that honeypots are normally written as all just being super hot, super young women who flirt the same way. (This is actually one I've started to draft, if only because her oc teammates are adorable and i love them.) It would deal with her self confidence, getting put into a team geared to her natural talent as opposed to being there as a mediator, her growing connection with her new teammates, and..... lots of dumb jokes about how the rookie nine & team seven handle Sakura's new job. It'd be a non-massacre au, and I am so immensely tempted to throw in Itachi getting a crush on her to Sasuke's intense chagrin- or even just, like, a boner joke! My aus are all so serious and this one is the opposite of that in every way. a dumb au where sakura makes friends and accidentally steals sasuke's fangirls and probably goes on a date with a foreign dignitary!

 

4\. Y'all love gaara, and I do too: so a gaara/sakura au that takes place in the forest of death, where Gaara accidentally saves Sakura just 'cause he wanted to fight the sound nin attacking her for funsies, but sakura is used to vaguely malevolent boys saving her so she's immediately like OH HEY GAARA YOU'RE THE BEST!!! NEW BEST FRIEND WHAT'S UP!!! and he plays along because it's nice having someone appreciate what he does. There's miscommunication about Sakura's actual power level, and lots of confused ninja, so essentially it's a fun romp with some coincidental murder and alterations to village politics. 

 

5\. Sasuke centric (i know, i know), where his overprotective streak towards his teammates gets worse and worse as time goes on, so instead of abandoning leaf he gets very clingy and defensive. Essentially it's an au where Sasuke doesn't take like ten years to figure out that team seven is his family, and instead embraces that fact with the same intensity he took to his revenge quest. Is it a little weird? sure! Do his teammates mind? Not really. (This is another one i've got drafted out but it's HARD to write from Sasuke's perspective.) 


	2. MORE ideas

some of these i've already made basic drafts/outlines for, but i can tell they'd be multi-chapter so I'm not gonna try and write them as of yet. got enough on my plate, you know? as always, feel free to write any of these yourself- just please give me a link so i can read it!!!

 

1) Sakura's Inner Sakura defeating ino's clan jutsu is not a one-off gag but a major plot point- just like the passing comment that she was a genjutsu natural. Kakashi is an Actual Teacher (tm) and figures if she can beat ONE clan's ultimate jutsu move with her apparent split personality, why not see if she can beat others?   
It wouldn't be fast or easy, but essentially the fic would be about sakura becoming a Clan Breaker- instead of getting really good at fighting in general, she specializes in deconstructing and defeating the fighting styles/kekkia genkei of bloodlines. (she starts just with konoha's, and then works her way on to opposing villages, under the Watchful Eye of sensei kakashi and a teammate she's won over with her ability to beat their clan's jutsu- neji, probably?) as she's doing this, she's praciticing a bunch with kakashi against the sharingon. There are ramifications for relying so much on having an Inner personality, definitely, but she figures it's worth the price to pay. 

by the time they finally go to face sasuke the sharingon is essentially useless against her- she can trap HIM instead of him trapping her in place, giving naruto the opportunity to knock the motherfucker out. 

also, there's absolutely an undercurrent of Ino thinking she's fucking crazy and the entire yamanaka clan being freaked out by her, because they've seen the inside of a lot of heads and none of them have looked like Hers. 

 

2) sakura decides to try and help hinata and naruto get together, because SOMEONE has to be happily dating in this damn village!! even if she has to lock them in a closet to do it !!! she starts to get a tiny crush on hinata as this happens but she firmly refuses to address it. Hinata gets a Giant Crush on sakura, and by the tenth or so attempt to get her and naruto to date, sakura is essentially just accidentally setting up the "Trying to date sakura" club meetings. the world's fluffiest fic that ends with hinata and sakura getting together, and naruto gets with rock lee who's been vaguely following their antics while trying to ask sakura out and accidentally falls in love with naruto instead. it's great ! everyone's happy! Tsunade is pissed she lost a bet on who would end up with who but very happy for such mature kiddos and their positive relationships. 

 

3) Sasuke isn't In Love with Sakura, but he's definitely weirdly attached to her in canon in a way he isn't with any other character. This fic would essentially take place right after he leaves Konoha to go to Oto, and it'd be about how he starts to focus on Sakura more and more as a way to cope with his semi-disasterous future? Like, he doesn't trust anyone in the sense of "knife near back is fine if it's you", but with Sakura he feels like he can trust she's always going to be in love with him and that she WOULD trust him in a "knife to my back" kind of way, which is something he would love to have while he's stuck in Backstabber Capital of the World Oto. Essentially it turns his sorta-weird attachment and genuine friendship that was forming with her and, as times goes on, turns it into a requited weird-obssession thing like Sakura had for him since it's the closest thing to a postive in his life at the time. It wouldn't ever be sexual, bc tbh sex would be too NORMAL for him, but he'd absolutely fantasize about interracting with her in ways that fit his understanding of their relationship- Sakura asking him to kill some people and him being Very Cool at doing it and she's impressed! Sakura being in danger and him being Very Cool at saving her! Sakura getting kidnapped and kept in Oto and she has to depend on him to keep her safe, which he does in a Very Cool Way! Sakura runs into him on a mission and begs for him to take her with him back to Oto but he tells her Her Future is too important and she should stay in Konoha, and she swoons and tells him she'd never date naruto even if he's gone for years because naruto is dumb and then he does something Very Cool and she's impressed! (You could say there's a specific trend in these fantasies, because Sasuke is like 15 and he's ridiculous thanks.) Sometimes he even imagines his family is alive and they're engaged and she spends her days helping out Mikoto around the house and talking about how much she hates his big brother Itachi. 

Sometimes he even tries to picture her as the age she must be now and he's wildly off-base with what he concludes she probably looks like- super long hair and she's probably learning genjutsu and she wears all sorts of pretty dresses and she depends on her teammates to keep her safe (Like ino has to when she uses her Clan Jutsu). 

Then he runs into Actual Sakura and- i dunno, honestly. he doesn't believe it's her? He freaks out over how much she breaks his three-years-standing fantasies? He thinks it's hot? Gigantic shrug bc i'm really not sure. 

 

4) the war lasts longer than it does in canon, and sakura's natural chakra control and ability to quickly learn things- and the fact that she's not the heir to a clan- puts her on the battlefield as a child. Sakura, Neji, Kiba, Sai, and Tenten are all between five and seven and are on the frontlines trying to Not Die. 

the war ends and Sakura (hopefully some of the others, but idk how realistic that would be) has survived. This isn't a BAMF sakura fic where the war gave her amazing abilities- she's actually pretty far behind the curricilum compared to the other kids, because she went into the war with about three basic skills and the expectation that when she'd die she would maybe take one or two enemy nin down with her. she survived not through being a prodigy or amazingly skilled, but by being very good at strategy, a bit of luck, and doing whatever it takes to survive. She ends up getting assigned to team seven and now kakashi has TWO kids he over-identifies with. 

Naruto doesn't have a crush in this version because he thinks she's scary. Sasuke hates her because she's weak and she survived the war, and his big bro was strong and died in it, which is Unfair and he hates her for it. His rivalry with naruto is with sakura instead. All sakura wants is to be able to have a hobby. and maybe get some revenge on every clan heir in this damn village, the spoiled assholes. 

This sakura would be like the inverse of a jack of all trades- she only knows like, two jutsu, but she can use them a million different ways and she fully understands them.


	3. Chapter 3

1) you know those ten million "Sakura is sent back into her 12 year old body to fix things" fics? that are all equally addictive and good but also pop up as often as, like, coffeeshop aus in other fandoms? OKAY SO ONE OF THOSE... but minus sakura being, like invested in team seven. she's there to fix things on a wide scale but at this point, everyone she ever knew died (in the future) and she's holding some Massive Grudges. She's mad at kakashi for not teaching her and for teaching sasuke the chidori, and she's made at naruto for fixating on getting sasuke back and using his promise to her as an excuse which made her feel super guilty, and she's mad at sasuke because he put a chidori through her chest for realsies and also killed like half the rookie nine and that's Not Cool Dude.

So anyways, she's bitter and afraid of getting attached and losing everyone again so instead of trying to fix team seven ("why is that my job??? WE HAVE A SENSEI. IF HE CAN'T FIX IT IM NOT WASTING MY TIME ON THIS BULLSHIT") she focuses on not attracting any attention by day and being an actual...ninja. by night. Like? during the day, she throughs herself into playing weak and dumb. She's not as mean to naruto but she's also not nice, she's essentially just decided to treat every human in her life like an acquintance she's just met. Distantly polite. except sasuke, who both terrifies her and also annoys her, so she throws herself into playing the vapid fangirl to piss him off specifically (When she can fight the instinct to avoid ever being near him EVER space please)

and then at night she's sneaking out to plot the downfall of the akatsuki, brutally assassinate danzou, Orichimaru, (and the sandaime? hm.) and like...just. fix the future on the wide scale immediately. after she kills danzou she accidentally inherits all 145 root agents and she's like well I CAN'T just NOT take care of them, and they're a valuable resource (Ew gross), so i guess im just gonna be in charge of teaching 145 people free will??? and emotions??? and sometimes ask them to help me secretly kill people?? she calls them brother and sister too bc thats cute, and they love it. they love their little sister who for some reason was able to kill danzou !!! shes the bestest. (also at some point somebody asks her how many siblings she has and shes tired so instead of responding "im an only child" she goes "145" and walks away to go take a nap.) they like to follow her around sometimes when she's playing at being Old Sakura & snicker at how dumb everyone is for falling for it, especially Kakashi who they expect better from. Sometimes they like to immitate her teammates to make her laugh & it almost always works. (sakura did not want to get attached to people and accidentally ends up getting fucking deeply attached to 145, whoops.)

at some point jiryai finds out that he's got a competitor for Best Spymaster and he's like...what the fuck. He's seen prodigies before, so hes not TOTALLY freaked out by the news its a 12 year old girl, but then he actually hangs out with naruto and hears all about ANOTHER pink haired 12 year old girl konoha nin and he's like mmm i'm pretty sure there's only one of those which means she must be REALLY good at hiding her fucking intentions. when he actually finally meets her its definitely a very "what the fuck, thats like a tinier more bitter tsunade" moment.

(sakura has the seal btw, and she literally just hides it by: 1. applying foundation, then 2. applying a genjutsu on top of that, and 3. wearing her forehead band over her forehead. its surprisingly effective as a disguise.)

anyways the big sticking point for this au would be that the Big Reveal (tm) of how far she's come and how different she is would be that....she literally doesn't care. Like it's at some point after half her enemies are dead or otherwise dealt with, and she's now in a position of semi-power in politics so nobody can have her killed, and the best way to play a situation is to use her full abilities & league of sibling assassins. so she does. and team seven is fucking confused as hell

 

2) a cute fic about naruto getting kidnapped as a genin (And absolutely winning over his abductors- probably kisami?), and sakura and sasuke team up to rescue him. sakura's so worried about him she doesn't have time to focus on her crush on sasuke, and sasuke starts to respect her contributions to the team, and they absolutely end up forming all sorts of pair strategies as time goes on because its hard not to when you cohabitate that intensely. technically they're missing nin (Bc no way would two baby genin be allowed to go after the kyuubi container) but kakashi is covering for them because maa, kids, what can you do. sometimes you just need to go on a revenge/rescue mission to save your dumbass teammate who you deeply care about, am i right? 

 

3) similar premise except that it's sakura who gets kidnapped, during the chuunin exams by- okay so TECHNICALLY by karin, but officially by Kusa who heard rumors of the planned invasion and decided to take advantage of it by collecting some promising genin. Karin picks out sakura bc chakra sensor + instinctive chakra natural= duh, but she feels super guilty about it and very much has no real choice in the matter. THUS, sasuke and naruto are the ones are a "save sakura, wherever the hell she got kidnapped to by that random girl right before/after orochimaru showed up" mission. (Naruto because He Cares, sasuke bc hes pissed someone kidnapped a teammate right from under him!!! not cool!!! hes supposed to be too strong for that stuff!!!) involves lots of naruto + sasuke bickering and bonding, as well as sakura and karin getting crushes on each other and helping each other survive in kusa. 

 

4) my favorite fics are the ones where team seven gets kidnapped/stuck in enemy territory as genin (+kakashi, obvi) and they end up getting really codependent and when they get back to konoha they still view others as 'the enemy' instinctively? but i don't think i could really handle writing that. So this is a similar version along those lines, except it happens late enough into their genin careers that the team pattern is pretty set in stone- and sakura's feelings of isolationism actually affect her? so essentially, when they get captured they're a team but they're not close knit, and it's not like sakura has felt like she can depend on anyone else by this point, and her feelings of inadequacy are probably heightened by somehow being 'at fault' for the capture. (used as a hostage to get the others, failed to probably defeat her combatant, didn't properly sense the enemy while one watch, ?) she's also probably the one most heavily tortured since she's the one that seems most likely to break. 

so when they do eventually manage to break out, while the REST of team seven is absolutely in that codependency scenario where they're pack and everyone else is a threat and please do not leave my eyesight for more then ten seconds because you might DIE, sakura is in a state where literally everyone registers as a threat for her, including team seven. 


	4. Chapter 4

1) au where sakura's first position as a med nin in training is as a nurse for sasuke (this takes place IMMEDIATELY after the chuunin exams as a carry-over from her decision to protect everybody in the forest of death) and gets over her crush on him so quickly bc he is the MOST ANNOYING patient ever born. not really sure where to take the plot i just feel like this is exactly what would happen in canon if she had to take care of whiney baby sasuke on bedrest for a month

2) soulmate au where the more intimately your first touch with ur soulmate is, the stronger the bond (most people have handshakes which is like, standard bf gf behavior- some people trip and have arms brush or legs which is more like We Bros, and if you first touch their face its like Romance, very much a plot in their romantic comedies.). sasori is her soulmate and since most of him is made out of wood, they don't figure it out until she's punched through his chest and grabs onto his heart- the only 'flesh' contact they've had all fight. whoops. 

the rest of the fic is smitten puppy sasori and his put-upon gf sakura. COMEDY! 

3) in which sakura realizes that her lack of growth post-forest of death is like, super ridiculous and frustrating, so she starts camping out in the forest of death to FORCE herself to grow more. dont want to train today? too bad, you either fight the giant centipede or DIE. she keeps running into higher ups who use the area for training/group practice stuff and wins them over, especially anko who thinks shes crazy (and is absolutely a fan of that). its mostly a lighthearted comedy scenario. at some point her jounin groupies invite her along for work experience bc they're going to an even SHITTIER place for a mission- maybe somewhere in mist or suna??- and of course she accepts. baby sakura with a million self preservation instincts that she ignores and her family of ridiculous jounin fans. she comes back with the skull of a monster they killed as a team and makes it her new mask, maybe even gets to wear it and tag along on anbu missions or something equally ridiculous. rookie nine have NO IDEA whats happening. i love dumb comedys that give sakura a cool family y'all. (shes not remarkably powerful or anything, just dumb and loveable and trying.) 

4) im apparently not the only one who loves fanboy sasuke, so this au would essentially be a form of role reversal in canon?? without changing their postions. basically the major difference is that itachi isn't a total dick so he doesn't set his brother up as his Longterm Suicide Plan and instead just peaces out, so sasuke's main goal is less revenge (tho hes still into that) but more Clan Revival. sakura, meanwhile, fucking HATES danzo bc his root troops are filled with civilian kiddies, including a few harunos- her big sister and a cousin or two included?- and shes smart enough and lucky enough to stumble upon some evidence of that. SO: sakura is all about revenge on A Certain Man, and sasuke is all about Finding A Girl (to marry) (and have a million kids with) and he absolutely is the type to get a crush on Brooding Efficient Sakura. sakura is nicer than sasuke and she can tell hes got some skills that could help so she goes along with it vaguely but finds it kinda annoying more than half the time. naruto finds them both very icky but also like, god i guess they're my best friends and family so i have to put up with sasuke writing poetry about her hair all the time :/// and helping sakura conduct a coup and kill an extremely powerful secret leader :/// just sibling things ://   
at the end of it sakura is like "Hey sasuke you wanted like, a lot of kids right" and then gestures to all the root agents and is like... meet the new uchiha clan. sasuke is so happy he might die but also wait sakura yO U STILL HAVE TO MARRY ME HEY WAIT I WANTED US TO HAVE-   
sasuke probably grows up to be a puppet hokage for sakura and naruto becomes the head of the hospital. sakura is a very put-upon researcher and diplomat. 

 

5) the haruno are an indentured clan who've served the uchiha for generations, a lot like how the hyuuga branches work, including a seal? (theres a lot of konoha jokes about the grim, dark-haired dark-eyed angsty fam and their constant companions, Pink Red Yellers) but anyways when itachi kills all the uchiha he kills the haruno too. Sakura is left out bc shes young enough that she hasn't recieved the seal FORCING her into serving the fam and itachi kinda assumes shes not gonna like...stick around for a shitty life with sasuke and she'll Go Be A Civilian Somewhere Else.   
instead its like, a weird reflection on her obsession with sasuke in a new way that makes it less weird? she's sorta forced into mothering him bc she's been training in how to care for uchiha her whole life, short as its been, and hes used to being taken care of...so she's in charge of cleanning clothes and cooking and making sure he gets enough sleep, and while he wouldn't listen to anybody else, hes just instinctually used to listening to Harunos about this stuff so he does it. sakura is the first haruno to become a ninja bc shes like, of course i'm going to help him on his revenge quest, what am i supposed to do, NOT do that? ridiculous. don't talk to me ever again. blocked. sakura's growth through the story is her learning that she counts as a person and is allowed to have her own motivations and relationships, and actually maybe she doesn't want revenge on itachi because the uchiha kind of sucked, or maybe she does want revenge on him but not for sasukes sake but her own, or- boy howdy morals are tough when you never needed them before! anyways yeah she slowly learns she can Be A Person, and the end result of this is when she meets Sai and is like...you can be a person! listen, i learned! and they bond over that and become super close and sakura is so relieved to have a relationship in her life not built around her taking care of them but them both freaking out over the same things together. 

sasuke's arc is slowly realizing sakura is a person, and then that she's a person thats important to him, and then that he maybe cares more about keeping his pseudo-sister alive then killing his bio brother on a revenge quest and THATS pretty freaky? and from the start he's overprotective of her, just like she's overprotective of him, but it takes him a long time to notice it and he only starts realizing that she maybe has opinions and thoughts of her own that are valid AFTER she starts moving away from obeying his every order and starts making friends. its really weird for him and difficult but eventually it kinda comes together and he struggles to figure out how to fit her into his life without expecting her life to revolve around him, and he starts going to sai for advice despite the fact that they do not get along AT ALL which is honestly pretty funny to imagine. 

6) another of my ten million honeypot sakura aus but in this one....she has an anbu backup team that follows her around and she teaches them how to fake emotions since thats literally her job description. this actually isnt a new au its just super far into the honeypot au ive already been working on and i love it. root agents keep running up to her in public to show off their new ability to Fake This Emotion and everyone else is like wow what did you do to piss that guy off so much he looked furious... "Yeah he did im really proud of him he finally got the eyebrows right!"


	5. wild and cheesy shit

1) sakura realizes shes bi and has a crush on kurenai, which kiba finds out about bc HES bi and has a crush on kakashi, which they bond about and its very cute... but kiba is TERRIBLE at keeping secrets and word travels fast in ninja village, and essentially all the girls are convinced that sakura is IN LOVE WITH THEM, SPECIFICALLY. and it's that phase that sometimes happens when you're thirteen and definitely bi/gay but think you're straight? like, Joining the Ally Group but as a STRAIGHT PERSON and thinking about girls kissing makes you feel weird and you think you're homophobic but actually you're just. into it.   
example: ino: OH EW SHE ALMOST TOUCHED ME!!! no wait shes my friend....i have to be nice!!!! take her shopping!!!! buy her things!!! cute things!!! cute underwear!!! sakura in cute underwear!!! sakura in WAIT NO WHAT AM I DOING 

anyways i have no idea what ship this ends with but absolutely at some point half the village has a crush on sakura and she STILL doesn't know that kiba let anything slip, because kiba's half of the fic is him on a desperate quest to prevent anyone else from finding out and failing miserably at it but he's doing okay at keeping SAKURA from knowing he accidentally told chouji who told shikamaru who told ino who told etc etc etc 

2) im not a big fan of modern, non-ninja aus, but the idea for this one is so fuckin funny to me i have to bring it up... it's like, a suburban neighborhood on the richside of things, everyones in their late twenties, its very Housewives Drama EXCEPT.... gaara is absolutely a serial killer. and it's never officially addressed.   
gaara is a gardner and theres vague implications the entire time that hes a serial killer. hes the local gardener and its just in the background of all the stereotypical drama- like ino makes a passing reference to a missing neighbor while talking about how shes thinking about cheating on her husband with the pool boy. kakashi is avoiding a conversation with naruto about a secret family will and distracts himself by watching the neighbors and oh huh guess someone hired gaara to dig a pool for them bc thats a big hole hes making right there in that backyard. "wow gaara thats a lot of ketchup on ur shirt!!!" "Yes....ketchup." [conversation proceeds like normal] at some point sakura's love interests keep dying in terrible accidents or leaving her or breaking up over text never to be seen again... sarada has figured out the situation but shes just like listen if ur nice to my mom and me its cool. if my dad ever comes back from his 'business trip' you kill him and we're even. gaara claims he has NO IDEA what she's talking about but also does a pinky promise so, you know, you decide.   
anyways its never CONFIRMED that its not just a series of stupendous coicidences... but...you know.... hm. 

3) au where sakura has littling siblings so when she sees a spoiled, very short boy entering konoha for the exams (aka gaara)...she automatically assumes hes like nine and being bullied into entering it by his big siblings. and its her RESPONSIBILITY to look after him!!! so she does. they run into each other during the forest of death and shes genuinely like YOUR SIBLINGS JUST LEFT YOU???? ALONE???????????? and makes him stick with her (Sasuke and naruto are busy hunting/scouting/being idiots who made The Girl tend the campsite). gaara, obviously, is fuckin loving this and goes along with it. at some point he talks her into leaving with him to get some scrolls and rigs it so she gets them. she finds this very endearing. they become penpals and its only like four years later when he stops by konoha again and has had a growth spurt that she realizes hes NOT like four years younger than her and his cute "babysitter crush" is actually...just like....he had a crush on her and he's weird. before this happens gaara takes great joy in rubbing it in naruto and lees faces that sakura is practically attached to his hip. there are reasons why sakura assumes hes a petulant nine year old, is all im saying. 

4) okay in this au kaguya isn't a big bad, shes not even in the story explicitely, shes just like... a nuetral mythological origin figure who sometimes pops up in old stories like you do when you're a god. anyways whats important is that she fucked a lady and sakura's her kid, and while kaguya was then Outtie bc like most gods shes not really into the "raising kids" thing, sakura totally has a very weird bloodline limit because of this. her big forehead? 'cause shes got a third eye and tiny horns. weird haircolor is also because of this. she pretends the moon is her mom and talks to it a lot, and she has a soft spot for bunnies, and did i mention shes really weird? her natural affinity for genjutsu comes from this, she's really good at creating Nice Genjutsu traps (But struggles with upsetting visions). shes got great chakra control still but struggles to develop her chakra since it's Nature based, not innate (since Alien) so she has very small reserves. most of her powers come on the mental side of things, and she can affect sharingan/etc users with genjutsu but it's much more difficult. 

ironically, despite this being my only au where shes got a bloodline limit, sakuras not at all concieted or excited about one of her moms literally being a god. she never brings it up, but doesn't have particular issue with it, and mostly avoids the topic at the academy/etc of bloodlines just bc she finds it annoying trying to explain whats essentially a Brand New Bloodline... so nobody particularly knows shes got any. this is mostly for comedy reasons, bc kakashi thinks hes getting Two Weirdos and a Normie, and then... THREE weirdos. bam! also if you ask her about her mom, she automatically starts talking about her civvie mom, even if the circumstances would make you assume she'd know you meant the one thats an alien god. sakura just doesn't really get that it's, like WEIRD. 

*her only major aesthetic change besides the horns is that she has white eyes like kaguya (Except her third eye when she finally develops it, which is green like her canon eyes are.) these leads to some jokes/guesses that she might be a hyuuga bastard, which hinata secretly is hoping is true becuase she'd LOVE to be sisters with sakura-chan!! 

the kyuubi finds her unsettling, but can't figure out why and decides its probably because she smells gross and constantly complains to naruto that his teammates need to bathe more.

5) anko accidentally kills kakashi like two days before teams are assigned. not wanting to deal with the repurcussions, she decides to masquarade as him, does a passable job, and ends up being a MUCH BETTER SENSEI then kakashi was, if an even weirder one. her number one focus besides teaching them to survive is DONT TRUST WEIRD MEN. ESPECIALLY ONES WITH SNAKES!!!! so sasuke? does not leave the village. also anko has no idea what kakashis tragic backstory is so she makes a new one everytime someone asks. 

6) bitter ass kakashi travels back in time from his time as hokage and assumes sasuke is unsaveable and naruto unguidable. instead of trying to do some major meddling, he instead just decides he'll focus on doing his job for once... training his student. singular. sakura! OBVIOUSLY she's been shown capable of immense growth, unlike those other two, so-   
anyways this accidentally changes everything bc the boys are so desperate to keep up, especially sasuke, with The Girl that it actually makes them more willing to work hard and focus and learn. naruto gets over his crush on sakura bc he no longer sees her as weak and depending on him, sasuke develops a crush for the same reasons, and sakura is so excited that someone is actually paying attention to her that she doesnt do anything except train her ass off and totally forgets that boys are like... a thing.  
im tempted to make a joke that instead of "those who abandon their team are worse than trash", kakashi possibly teaches them something like "those who dont listen to sakura and support her growth are worse then trash", but im just a stan with ridiculous ideas of comedy.


	6. lighthearted

1)  
Genin au, sakura is convinced (like many others) in the academy that sasuke is into ‘damsel’ types. She’s smart enough to know her career path doesn’t allow for ACTUAL weakness so she mantains her abilities and works hard to get stronger/faster/better/etc, but whenever the team is together she plays at not being capable because she’s naive enough to put her crush first. At some point on a mission, she runs into a scuffle inducing situation (nothing crazy, but also something suitably impressive) while out doing chores and assumes her team’s not nearby. Sasuke goes with a sigh to save her and...stops and watches as she easily handles the situation on her own.   
Sasukes newest hobby, when not imagining different ways to murder itachi, is sneakily watching sakura be very good at her job when no one’s looking.  
Bonus: this charade accidentally has sakura fly under the radar for lots of opponents, in the village in particular, especially since so many of them judge skills by “prodigy records” (academy notes and genin to chuunin promition speed). 

 

2)  
Misunderstanding what sakura means when she jokes about how her teammates have “nothing she hasn’t seen before”, team seven is convinced that sakura...is a player. Shes just a mednin whos experienced and thus rather unaffected by nudity and genitalia. The misunderstandings continue growing more and more ridiculous (patients confused for exes, off handed comments sounding like she’s had threesomes/foursomes/etc, overheard descriptions of what weird shit she’s had to remove from patients butts in the emergency room being misconstrued as a sex thing, and so on). Kakashi is originally extremely proud (she takes after the old sensei, he stipulates, as if he’s having sex and not just reading about it in public) but as time goes on he grows frantically convinced he’s created a MONSTER. A sex monster!!! It convinces him to even give up reading icha icha in public as penance. Naruto is jealous of whoever she slept with at first, and then quickly grows jealous of sakura’s apparent skills with the ladies, and then circles around to desperate student who respects her with all his heart. After all that time with Jiriyai, he’s honestly in awe of an ACTUAL player who can ACTUALLY score and not just write about it a bunch while being a total creep in reality. Sasuke is confused and disbelieving at first, takes a while to accept it, and then becomes frantically disgusted and vaguely emasculated with exactly WHO he thinks sakura has managed to sleep with. (That ANBU guy? Shikamaru? some random guards? Fine! But that councilman? Tsunade AND shizune? Iniochi? MAIGHT GUY? ITACHI?????)   
Sakura does not catch on to their misunderstandings. Everyone else eventually does and begins to use it as a source of amusement and a betting pool staple. Even Hinata gets in on it because honestly team seven is just too fuckin funny to mess with.  
The plot twist ending is probably that sakura has secretly been living one of those “sakura x all the akatsuki” fics this whole time, unmentioned, and genuinely does have like seven boyfriends but she’s making them wait until marriage. (shes not a virgin, she just thinks its funny that they’re all willing to go along with that stipulation as if they’re not world famous master criminals with personal fanclubs.) (konan is required to be included but not all the boys. but the girl!!! is!!! required!!!!) 

3)  
real life au where team seven is a shitty garage band. kakashi plays drums and used to be in a mildly popular rock band before an onstage accident disfigured the lead singer (and rin, their guitarist, had left to go to medical school). hes a has-been who barely was, basically, but hes the person LEAST interested in his previous fame out of all of them. also he refuses to admit how old he is (naruto guesses too high, sasuke too low.) also hes the bands triangle-player, which he demands be included in all the posters/etc, despite the fact that they've never needed the triangle in any of their songs. if sasuke has his way they never will. Naruto plays guitar explicitely because that's the Cool Instrument that Gets Chicks. he also does backup vocals. hes not allowed to write any of the songs, but he's in charge of designing the chorus bc he's stupidly good at making them catchy as hell. Sasuke is the head songwriter, lead singer, and melodramatic organizer of it all who wants their band to outshine his brother's popular boyband, but with "Real music, not like that sellout!!!". Sakura is the last recruited to it because she sees an ad for it on a bulletin board. she plays bass guitar (and is frickin killer at it), and her secret is that she's an ex-idol trying to make some cash doing what she loves with way less restrictions. kakashi knows, because hes been a huge fan of the group she was in for years (Cherry-chan was his favorite!!! he gets to work with his hero!!! wow!!) but she bribes him into silence by agreeing to sign all his merch for him. she thinks its to sell on ebay but its not. every mug in his house says Love From Cheery-Chan! <3 and variations thereapon. sakura and sasuke but heads alot specifically bc sasuke is all about being in charge and sakura is so done with putting up with that stuff. (eventually hinata shows up dramatically, a beautiful reunion occurs, and hinata confesses she finally left the hyuuga company because shes in love!! has been for years!!! pls understand sakura!!!! its beautiful and touching and halfway thru the confession naruto leans over to ask sasuke if he has any idea who this lady is and sasuke is like not a clue. kakashi is star struck. sakura and hinata get together, hinata supports the band and becomes an actress, they both star in the first lesbian jdrama together, etc etc etc. the world is a beautiful place. sasuke is fine with it because his band is finally more popular than itachis. take that!!!) 

4)   
sakura doesnt hold a grudge team seven. she also does not have a soft spot for them. sakura admires tsunade, cares for ino, is roommates and close with sai, and vaguely respects kiba despite herself. she doesn't really need validation from anyone else when her life has that many people to worry about and love as it is. when naruto comes back from his 3 year little trip, it takes him a while to notice her distance, but once he does he starts dragging kakashi into it too (And eventually sasuke). genuinely this one would be mostly crack, in which naruto keeps trying to win over sakura and she does not notice. kakashi thinks hes been a very great, attentive sensei, who gets along great with sakura! until naruto points out all the ways that sakura is avoiding him too. (not how kakashi is bad, neither of them think THEY'VE done anything wrong, it's just a matter of Sakura sure is acting weird all of a sudden and possibly these past three years my bad) eventually even when naruto and kakashi run into sasuke things get extra ridiculous since sasuke is quickly roped into the Why Is Sakura Actign So Weird? game. (sasuke: im here to kill you!!! naruto: yeah okay but have you seen sakura??? has someone been messing with her head??? has kabuto mentioned doing that???? sasuke: wait sakuras not here?? wtf how rude!!)   
sakura, meanwhile, is living a glorious and well managed life, going about her business without a care in the world. the worst thing that happens is when she forgets to turn the stove off, rushes home, and finds that sai has done it for her and also made cookies while she was out.   
the fic summarized: sakura: boy, i sure love every aspect of my life! so many healthy rewarding relationships. the rest of team seven: I THINK SAKURA HAS BEEN REPLACED WITH A IMPOSTER JUTSU !! OR AN ALIEN!! OR BOTH!!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some of my favorite silly aus that i doubt i will ever have the energy to write

1) the Perfect Solution to Naruto Universe au where the only change is that sakura is saved by might gai instead of ino as a kid from bullies, admires him, and becomes a STUDENT OF HARDWORK immediately....which has huge ramifications for the entire naruto universe. essentially it's the perfect world, because this one change has a major ripple effect. naruto's crush on sakura means he starts working hard at a young age to keep up/impress her. sasuke is unfortunately attached to his two weird, overly enthuisastic classmates (Since sakura proves an actual rival in class to him). when they're put on a team they actually become something of a family because of this genuine attachment between them all. kakashi is so miserable over having a small gai on his team that he actually invests time trying to 'fix' her (and failing, obviously, but that means he's not doing a Huge Sasuke Favoritism thing). things just continue from there in a spiral of Postive Motivation and Belief and YOUTH STRENGTH!!!   
sakura absolutely wears the green spandex + ankleweights and its hilarious. 

2) sasuke (shippuden era) kidnaps sakura (Whos around mid-training with tsunade) in an effort to enduce stockholmes syndrom and get her Medical Nin help with his revenge quest. instead, he ends up developing lima syndrome and sakura is thoroughly uninterested. he doesn't seem to pick up on just how poorly his plan is going, and none of team taka or orochimaru's input shakes this particular belief of his.   
(i would genuinely pay someone else to write this tbh like...hit me up if you want to do a fic/art trade or something i just love the comedy this could produce.) 

3) MAKEUP GURU AU:   
Naruto- outrageously popular, half of his channel is him doing dumb dangerous shit (me n my friend light our house on fire! U won’t believe what happens next :O !) and the other half is avante garde makeup looks that earn him a spot doing makeup for high end fashion. He’s super nice to fans and does a lot of giveaways, and makeup companies keep hiring him for collabs and sponsorship stuff partially bc hes positive about EVERYTHING and partially bc fans love him so much. His whiskers are his trademark look. Sasuke fuckin HATES THEM. this might be a main reason for naruto doing them so often. 

Sasuke- cut crease is his TRADEMARK. Extremely popular. Refuses to admit any relation to his brother itachi who stars on rupauls drag race bc) 1. He will not use the family name to get ahead! He will earn it himself! 2) rupaul is so problematic ugh no way does he want to admit connection to someone willing to take part in the trash heap. Obviously the MOST popular vlogger, but he’s known for being rude to fans and terrible at twitter beefs.

Ino- shes gorgeous, does DIY stuff and lots of boyfriend challenges (always with a different boyfriend) and absolutely works with a bunch of celebrities all the time. Keeps trying to get sasuke’s attention bc a collab could be SO PROFITABLE for the both of him. Shes the best at marketing out of all of them, but she’s brutally honest when it comes to product reviews and super open about when she does affiliete codes so her audience trusts her. Shes really good at mataining a “professional but not TOO professional” vibe on social media, so she’s approachable but Better Then. she’s started doing some modeling outside of makeup stuff too which is exciting. 

Sakura- initally a guest star in Ino’s vids, often a test dummy for ino’s makeup looks and stuff, but shes super cute and popular and ino talks her into starting her own channel. It’s not OUTRAGEOUSLY popular but sakura is good at doing the types of niche tutorials that aren’t really niche- makeup that really IS waterproof, makeup looks for your kickboxing tournament, makeup for when you have a six am class but the teacher is a dick who secretly grades you on apperances for professionalism, etc. sasuke is subscribed to her which gives her a huge boost in fans & he refuses to admit it but he absolutely wants to use her as a model, why did she have to agree to collab with naruto and never asked him for a collab??? Technically he could ask her himself but like, no. 

shino- runs a drama blog and ALWAYS has the best reciepts. it's claimed he once sent sasuke a basket of fruits for his birthday as a thank you for providing like, half the content on his channel. 

4) obligatory harry potter au where sakura is a muggleborn whos best friends with naruto (whos dad is secretly a big deal but naruto goes by his moms last name bc hes going thru a rebellious phase so people dont know) and she starts a fight club in her free time. sasuke is slytherin, naruto hufflepuff, sakura ravenclaw, obviously. naruto considers sasuke his rival since they're on opposing quidditch teams, but sasuke considers sakura as his rival since she keeps doing way better at him in classes (even potions, which orochimaru teaches and OBVI he favors sasuke). when sasuke finds out about sakura and narutos 'study club' he goes to spy and see what their secret to academic success is...and then finds out its the aformentioned Fight Club, where sakura teaches kids how to punch real good.   
sakura doesn't consider him a rival at all (just a cute boy that her bestie has a friendly rivalry with) so she immediately assumes he's there to join the club and sasuke.... does not correct her. his crush is terrible and obvious and naruto delights in teasing him about it, and sasuke enters his own Family Rebellion phase by the next year because his best friends are a muggleborn and a half muggle prankster, the horror!   
additionally, theres a subplot about him wanting to kill Betrayer Itachi still (Who didn't kill his whole family but was like, a death eater or destroyed a town and ruined the family name or something), and the fic ends with sasuke showing up to a magic duel with his bro and then he just shoots itachi with a gun and calls it a day.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more sasusaku than i'd personally like but im going thru a phase, y'all.

1) modern setting au, sasuke is a put-upon director to naruto's exuberant demanding producer. when sakura shows up on his set "naruto's orders", he immediately breaks down and gives a Big Declaritive speech that hes SO SICK OF NARUTO !!! TRYING TO PICK HIS ACTORS FOR HIM!! he doesn't care that she's super hot and has obviously modelled and could look great on posters because obviously, hes an ARTIST, and he wants a leading lady for his picture who can ACTUALLY ACT and who has chemistry with the male lead and he did NOT spend the past year carefully selecting the side characters color schemes just for naruto to throw some model into the mix as if she's got any chance of fitting into his beautiful complex puzzle of a film.  
sakura: um...thanks i guess and wahoo artistic vision or whatever, but im literally just ur camera woman. kakashi called in sick so he could work a porno instead and im his replacement.   
sasuke: i literally need to go die right now thanks   
sasuke frantically calls naruto from the closet of his office so he can yell frantically at his bestie slash worst nightmare. he asks sakura out like a month later when he first sees the final result of some of her shots and is like finally....someone who understands my VISION. she refuses three times in a row until he admits its also bc naruto keeps forwarding him her bikini instagram pictures.  
their ongoing fued is sakura's unwillingness to star in his productions and sasukes absolute conviction that she was BORN to be a star and how dare she not follow her destiny???!!!? 

2) i have a soft spot for yanderes (unfortunately) and im delighted by the idea of a yandere!sasuke x yandere!sakura au where they haven’t figured out that the other one is equally fuckin crazy. like they spend six years mutually pining in increasingly drastic, and Ethically Bad ways, finally get together, spend four years dating, and then one of them slips up and they go OH HEY SAME! everyone views them as a very adorable healthy Perfect Couple Goals relationship. naruto calls them boringly average. kakashi often prompts them to retire early before the life ‘scars them’. sakura and sasuke both find this HILARIOUS. 

3) sasori kidnaps genin sakura (for complicated aakatsuki prompted reasons). sakura does not realize its a kidnapping, and enjoys a lovely vacation with her uncle sasori who her parents never mentioned but look he has the hair and the eyes and its fine, right? its fine. sasori accidentally develops a soft spot for his 'niece' and turns the kidnapping into a vacation after all, sets her up on a date with gaara, and proceeds to teach her terrible ethically-dubious mayhem inducing nin skills that she brings back to konoha with a spring in her step and a new penpal uncle. 

4) Kakashi fails at wave to keep the kids safe, they get kidnapped, by the time he (And the backup team) catch up sasuke is dead, naruto is comatose, and sakura….has a new right eye. Sakura claims that sasuke gave her the eye- forced it on her even, as a last act-, but only half the people believe her. as for if shes telling the truth- well, that would come at the end of the fic, obviously!   
Itachi comes to kill her at some point, but bc she didn’t dedicate her fuckin life to just using some dumb eye, she beats him with jutsu NOT directly up his skillset. obviously. dumbass. 

5) sakura and ino accidentally switch heads when ino uses her yamanaka jutsu on her. they both immediately set about Ruinning Eachothers Lives, except actually, wait no, we love each other i guess :// so basically while they try a few destructive things (ino keeps insulting sasuke, sakura keeps wearing terribly clashing clothes) they pretty quickly start trying to make things better for each other. (Ino talks someone into being sakura's teacher, sakura talks asuma into giving ino a team leader position, ino absolutely terrifies kakashi into promising to pay attention to sakura, sakura outsmarts shikamaru and insults him into actually respecting women/ino from there out, etc). it only takes like three days for them to finally get switched back (By ino's dad, the only person in on the mistake) and immediately set about making up as friends and planning how to form their own team and get Good Boyfriends and oh my god, mr yamanaka is pretty sure he's witnessing either the next hokages making their start or the future gang leaders of some rebel ex-nin formation and hes never been more proud. 

6\. sakura dates kiba, a lesbian, and they're super happy together and my brain stops yelling at me about au naruto plotlines


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> not my best, but all very fluffy

1) ice skating au where sakura does ice hockey and everyone else are professional ice skaters who are DEEPLY IN LOVE after they accidentally get scheduled to practice at the same time. Sakura ends up being a natural for partner skating (Bc shes got the strength for lifts and stuff, they have to work hard to get her to understand the 'graceful movements' thing). she always has a broken nose or black eye or split lip in her daily life from hockey practice but like, she totally makes it #work

2) a/b/o fic but not sexual just like, behavioral? (and in this verse betas would be the rarest version, but not in a 'desireable' sense, just uncommon.) and sakura is beta- even tho, by attitude obviously she'd be an alpha- bc plotwise she fits into that role well? and she has to put up with her dumb teammates dumb behaviors and try to figure out how to stand out in a world were she's unusually  _bland._ (Naruto's an Alpha, prone to over-affectionate contact and bursts of anger. Sakura's great for controlling him because she doesn't find his smell scary, just vaguely gross; and she doesn't have hormones that flair up in response to his own when hes basically spewing out Anger.) (Sasuke's an omega who ends up latching onto sakura specifically because she's a beta and doesn't know that what he's doing is like, part of That Stuff, so he's free to nest near her and scentmark her and all she thinks is 'huh sasuke sure is a lot messier than i originally thought'.) sakura basically undervalues herself a lot bc society does, but sarutobi knew what he was doing when he put her on team seven because she really does connect everyone together. sakura has no idea the ten million weird rituals going around her are even happening, or what they mean if she DOES notice them, but like, it's cool. the boys are her bros!! and kakashi acting like a Parent is at least normal for her (since she's, you know, got alpha parents n all). sasuke and naruto fight over who gets to keep her dirty clothes when she forgets to do the laundry on long missions. sakura wears the really strong shampoos and stuff specifically to hide that she doesn't have much of a smell (from enemies). i dunno i just remember reading a cool fic a while ago that approached a/b/o as a socialization thing (and it had alpha sakura!! which is Correct!!) and i thought that was a really interesting concept. 

3) sakura is a witch in a world of demons, monsters, and general fairytale creatures. she's very low-bar, all things considered, which is why it's so goddamn funny when she's finally old enough to take on a side kick and it feels like half the magical world kicks up a storm for the position. (for varying reasons, of course- naruto is a given. Ino, a siren, wants to spend more time with her bestie. kakashi is convinced sakura will let him nap all the time, not like his last master! sai is being manipulated by nefarious spirits but also he makes a very good brisket, sakura, so consider the cost carefully of turning him down. sasuke just knows that itachi wanted to be a witch's familair and still isn't one so of course he's got to get the position first and finally beat his brother.) 

4) sakura does not want to be a ninja, or a doctor. she wants to be a librarian. her mom even lets her spend her days at the library, helping the desk chuunin out for practice! unfortunately, sakura keeps meeting ninja at her practice-job, and getting wrapped up in all sorts of Ninja Situations despite herself. 

5) konohas next top model au bc i love bad reality tv like that and it WORKS. sasuke is the person who in week one, claims hes "not there to make friends!", bullies a few of the other contestants, and then by week three has a breakdown bc nobody likes him. sakura is the one who gets the super extreme ridiculous makeover (we're making it pink!!! AND cutting it all off!!!!) and she cries about it but then adjusts and wins the following challenge. naruto keeps getting in trouble for doing 'too much' in the photos and not looking model-enough. kiba gets kicked off first bc he refuses to stop filing his teeth to points. ino is the one constantly bragging about her previous modelling experience (the fact that she needed to enter this show to get rep, so clearly her career isn't THAT good, going unmentioned). chouji is the one with genuine posing skills and a friendly demeanor that's great for getting jobs, but the show keeps trying to make him a Very Special Episode bc he's a plus size model. kakashi is competing and doing fairly well as "the old one" until he points out that tsunade (the host) is almost the same age as him and she literally kicks him out. like with her foot. right in the gut. 

idk who wins but there's a LOT of house drama and silly challenges and it's all very silly and fun. 

6) the Bachelorette au where hinata is the bachelorette (who was left at the alter the previous season, oh no!) and all the bachelors are highly competative at least partially bc she's a rich model. naruto is competing bc his manager made him, but hinata is genuinely in love with him and has been for years, so obviously this ends with them getting together. sakura is one of the main camera women, and gaara (forced into being a contestant to improve his pr after the murder accusation shhh dont ask) is a contestant who spends less and less time trying to win over hinata and more and more time trying to win over sakura. fans are deeply invested in this growing mystery background romance (there are a million gifs all over tumblr of gaara looking slightly beyond the camera and blushing, winking, mouthing sentences. sometimes the camera just barely shakes and you can tell it's bc sakura is laughing so goddamn hard.) gaara gets to stick around for a very long time bc he's naruto's buddy and hinata wants naruto to be able to hang out with his friends!!! (The show is so desperate for some kind of drama- since hinata is so obviously already decided- that even they begin to focus on the gaara situation.) 

 

bonus: i'm now posting fanart sketches up on my tumblr! 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ghost ideas! and then dumb fun.

1) starts off in canon, except sasuke doesn’t survive orochimaru’s bite. (he lasts long enough to wake up and use that once to save naruto and sakura, and dies right after that.) he becomes a ghost & latches onto sakura, because “come on sakura naruto might be stronger but when has he literally ever accomplished anything?” he’s weirdly encouraging since hes basically saying he’s willing to depend on her to complete his revenge for him (Which he absolutely is), and sakura starts to value herself better bc of this support. she goes on to apprentice to tsunade and eventually hunt down both orochimaru and itachi for revenge. sasuke is her sassy floating best friend, and he sticks around after getting revenge bc secretly his third ghost-goal was to keep an eye on his teammates. aww! anyways he’s the reason sakura’s considered a fuckin Oracle in the field (how else can she know whats happening behind her back? sasuke tells her.) shes also considered mildly crazy but who isn’t. sasuke manages to pass on some of his abilities to her through Ghostly Connections, so sakura goes on to develop red eyes and mild mimic abilities, as well as an affinity for fire and lightning she’d never had before (naturally having an affinity for water).  

2) non-ninja au where all the uchiha (Sasuke included) were killed in a Terrible Fire at the compound. Sakura was classmates with sasuke as kids, and she ends up accidentally having his ghost get attached when she goes as a teen to visit the compound and pay her respects. sasuke’s still like ten but he remembers sakura, remembers them being friends and that they sorta-almost ‘dated’ (as much as ten year olds can date, lmao), and he starts following her around to make sure she’s okay. of course, itachi’s a good big bro and won’t let his little brother go around alone! long story short sakura has like. 25 ghosts following her around all of the time. 

turns out konoha is supernatural central, but sakura is completely oblivious (Being one of the few mortal-as-it-gets residents) and her roving pack of uchiha are devoted to keeping her alive. also unscammed. and mikoto refuses to let her keep eating so terribly, thats awful for her health! and sasuke does NOT approve of her new boyfriend, and- 

over half the town can see sakura’s spectral parade, and deal with their shenanigans, while trying to hide their reactions from sakura. COMEDY!

3) sakura is a longstanding kiri ghost (From the second ninja war) who decided to stick around for funsies and maybe eternal revenge, listen, shes 12, she's not exactly nuanced. she gets a soft spot for naruto and starts following him around as a kid and trying to look out for him. as time goes on, naruto accidentally keeps feeding her 'kyubi energy' and she becomes more and more corporeal, until he can see and interact with her (and boy is he happy when that happens! whats up bitches naruto has a friend- a BEST friend- and shes a GHOST! how cool is that? also she has funny sharp teeth and she died in a war and she can float! the coolest ever, right?) she only 'meets' sasuke when the genin teams are formed and she instantly gets a big crush (Even though it's partially bc she thinks his moody habits are funny). naruto finds this frustrating. 

kakashi has to deal with having a tiny foreign agent haunting his team on top of everything else. naruto keeps imitating kiri fighting bc sakura was his main taijutsu teacher as a kid, which makes him TERRIFYING in battle bc it's a lot of scare tactics and animalisitc movements. sasuke gets a crush bc she's dead and scary, two things that take up a lot of his interest in general. sakura just wants her silly leaf family to be okay and maybe eventually fix kiris broken government or whatever but mostly, like, just be healthy. (or die in a way tragic enough for them to stick around and hang out with her! shes not picky.) 

4) nonmassacre au. sasuke figures out as a chuunin he “like-likes” sakura, but still refuses to act on it. itachi finally comes back from his three-year mission, meets sakura, and decides to use sasuke’s hesitance against him. (”Sasuke, you don’t like your old teammate sakura, right?” “OF COURSE NOT” “so if i asked her out, you’d not have any problems with that?” “.................n...o......” “Great!”) but itachi is, before all else, a shitty big bro, so of course he draws it out to really mess with sasuke. successfully. of course.

when they finally go to ask sakura out once and for all it turns out shishui already asked her out and they’ve started dating. it’s going great and they're in a honeymoon phase! why do you guys look like someone threw up on ur favorite shirt? 

5) not an au but y'all the song Brandy by Looking Glass is SO canon sasusaku in boruto (Aka tragic and unfair to sakura). 

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Clan Breaker](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15736743) by [CosplayAdventures](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CosplayAdventures/pseuds/CosplayAdventures)
  * [Copycat Snake](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15780174) by [AnonMax](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonMax/pseuds/AnonMax)




End file.
